Sunday, July 13, 2008

Club Tantra: My Experience, Unabridged 3

After the massage, Charlie and I wandered through the corridor of lust, peeking into the rooms prepared for play. We walked into an empty room. Half the bed was soaking wet. We suspected Mr. Vinyl and his girlfriend (who was wearing the same dress, in white) were responsible for the mess, for we heard some butt-whacking, pussy-clenching screams earlier.

As we surveyed the room, we noticed there were no condoms or lube or any safe sex supplies in sight. Of course we brought our own necessities, but what a turn-off! Such accoutrements are standard protocol at every reputable swinger / public sex event. Their absence here was a sign that something was amiss. Still, we were here. So we covered the wetness with pillows and melted into each other on the clean part of the bed. Then we made love, healing our bruised hearts in the soft red glow of that unfamiliar room.

As we were basking in each other, Mr. Hunky and his girlfriend walked in. He asked if we minded.

“Not at all. Please stay,” I said.

We warned them about the wet spot on the bed. Then we cuddled and kissed while discreetly observing the newcomers. I watched them as they stood at the edge of the bed, undressing. He was soft-spoken and admirably considerate, alternating between seducing her and pacifying her nerves. She hardly uttered a word and never smiled. She was silent as he lowered her down next to us. They had beautiful bodies, classically ideal male / female archetypes. Her pleasantly tan skin shimmered in the rosy lighting. I observed her silence, the contours of her self-conscious form.

As he kissed around her pussy, he said, “I love it when you shave.”

Although I am not a fan of bald pussies, his preference and desire for her shaved twat turned me on. Her nervous submission turned me on. I wanted to experience something with them.

Just then the other young couple walked in and asked if they could join us. “It’s okay with me,” I said. Charlie added his non-verbal consent.

No one else responded. But it didn’t seem okay with her. The new couple began making out in a corner. A vague discomfort permeated the room. A few minutes later, they were gone. I’m not sure what happened. Mr. Hunky may have said something. Or maybe they left of their own accord because they didn’t feel welcome. People come and go at orgies, and it’s not always clear what makes them move. It boils down to communication and energy. Sometimes a change in energy is enough to make a point.

Charlie and I were on the same wavelength; we knew, without a word, that we had to initiate slowly with them. Mr. Hunky was far more amenable, but it was up to her. It was up to her and me. It’s always up to the women in group-sex situations. She opened her eyes and looked over at us a few times. So virginal in her curiosity! So unspoiled by the scene! She needed nurturing from a soft woman’s lips, the lips of someone who accepted her trepidation and allowed her to hold the reins in her silent, submissive way.

“May I kiss you?” I asked, kneeling next to her at a respectable distance.

She looked at me and nodded. Her kisses were soft and sweetly wet.

“I like the way you kiss,” I said.

She didn’t smile or react in any other way. She was so passive; I wasn’t quite sure what she was feeling. I wanted to move onto her breasts, but she closed her eyes and disappeared. I reclined to our side of the bed and relaxed as Charlie licked my pussy.

I watched them closely, even when I wasn’t looking. I watched them with my body, aligning their rhythms to my own sensations.

If I focus on someone else’s sexual experience, I am able to manipulate my own progression as a mirror to what I am witnessing, similar to the way in which a cerebral fantasy can direct one’s solitary journey through masturbation. In this case, I was focusing on Mr. Hunky’s experience. She was merely a vessel for his pleasure as I imagined his lust for me. Or maybe I didn’t imagine it. We had an intense connection during the Puja. Now our eyes connected again as he was fucking her and Charlie was bringing me to orgasm with his tongue. In my sexual mind, Charlie had become an aid for my connection to this stranger man. It wasn’t about Charlie and me. Nor was it about the female statue at my side. It was all about this beautifully subtle, soul connection between Mr. Hunky and me. We knew and understood each other completely in those moments, and nothing else mattered. I whispered a few standard lines to Charlie, while looking askance at Mr. Hunky. “My pussy is so wet…” and “It feels so good…” Mr. Hunky, in turn, uttered a few comments about her: “I love the way your pussy feels…”

Our consideration for our partners stopped when our conscious selves were no longer in control. No matter what we said or did, our partners weren’t included in the energy exchange that flowed through his hand clasping mine. It was as though he was fucking me, not her! I wanted to come for him. I offered my fingers to his mouth and he sucked with passion. Our eyes locked as orgasm ascended from the depths of my being…

“I’m coming…watch me come!” I said to him, squeezing his hand.

Afterward, we looked at each other. He smiled at me. I looked down at Charlie and thanked him. I looked back up at them and noticed that she had ceased responding to his thrusts. She had seen something she didn’t want to see.

“What’s going on? Are you okay?” He asked her in his soft, considerate voice. “Do you want me to lick your pussy?”

I don’t remember what else he said, but I’ll never forget the stone-cold look on her face. I’ll never forget how deliberately she extracted herself from him, how stoically she walked over to her clothes and started dressing. He followed her and tried to placate her, tried to find the source of her distance. He knew what it was, I’m sure, but he wanted to hear it from her. “Talk to me,” he said.

It was sad to watch this scene. She was so removed that he couldn’t bring her back. But she wasn’t really there to begin with. He gathered the remainder of their clothes and escorted her out. A few minutes later, he returned alone.

“I’m sorry about that,” he said. “She’s…never done this before…”

“That’s okay…I understand,” I said.

“It’s okay,” Charlie concurred.

Poor Mr. Hunky. How much more considerate could he have been?

“It was nice meeting you,” he said. “Enjoy the rest of your night.”

Then he left us to ourselves, to imagine the silent conversations that would inevitably ensue between them.

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